edit: [email protected] found it after I forgot to save the link: https://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/windows/forum/all/unable-to-install-updates-unless-battery-is/99bb073a-948e-4ccf-b14f-46e192fac457
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I saw a great one yesterday.
Question: Help, I can’t boot, here’s the error code. I’m stuck in a loop and can’t get into windows.
Answer: Open Microsoft explorer, navigate to…
Found the post on the forums. The screenshot omits the comment from Craig who said “I ended up wiping windows and installing Ubuntu instead”.
I found this reply helpful too, and so should you.
Hehe.
Thank you, I’ve updated the post body.
I’m John from Microsoft and I have over 25 years of experience.
Please update your drivers and run run sfc /scannow.
I hope that helps,
John
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Into Cmd, super commandline or super commandline 2?
Or then you do find an article that helps but its a registry edit.
With an alternative method involving a page in settings that only existed between may 2015 and feb 2016.
Why is Microsoft’s support so completely and utterly useless, anyway? Do they purposely hire people who don’t understand how computers work for their support team? They almost always reply with a “solution” that has absolutely nothing to do with the issue at hand. Why are they so bad at their jobs?
Because they’re not Microsoft support. Microsoft Answers is a user forum and the “MVPs” there providing “support” are at best volunteers and at worst bots.
My guess is they oursourced the work to people who only understand basic English and answer the question they were able to decipher from a few keywords and the assumption that the question is about the most basic aspect of those keywords.
My favorite one was an issue with a device not showing up when plugged in, and their solution is to click on it and reinstall drivers
As a user, it seems to me that Microsoft figured out a way to get the customers they care about to hire and pay for their own “Microsoft support” people.
If I have a problem at work with one of those M365 websites I use, or with the Windows partition I don’t, and I can’t fix it myself, the person helping me is going to be a fellow employee and not [email protected].
Honestly a month ago me and my friend were looking at microsoft forums. One of which was somebody asking why tiktok was preinstalled in windows 11. Forum admin replied that it was bloat from a manufacturer of the hardware. It was a homebuilt computer and fresh copy of windows 11 home.
28 more people said windows 11 did this by default, the admin eventually realized it was not accidental or a fluke. Which he previously eluded to.
Shows the current state of windows 11
Alluded
I like to think it was a wordplay.
They should’ve told them to run sfc /scannow
The entire thread is hilarious.
“I had to remove my laptop’s battery, now Windows won’t update.”
“Are you using a laptop or desktop?”
“I said I am using a laptop without a battery.”
“Please share a screenshot of your device manager, so I can make sure whether or not you are using a laptop or desktop.”
“Fine.” (Posts screenshot)
“According to your screenshot, you are using a laptop, and it has a battery in it. Please charge the battery to 40%.”
“That’s it. I’m using Linux.”
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Sometimes it makes a network connection work temporarily.
Actually I had an issue where trying to sign into my samba share caused explorer.exe to crash constantly, running
sfc /scannowfixed it surprisingly. Glad that’s on my “these programs only work on Windows” system.
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You know, last time I’ve reached the MS forum, there was a support person there answering “No, there’s no way to disable the Teams pop-up that appears over your shared screen when you mute the microphone. Lots of people ask the same question, and the developers have no plans of changing this”.
The answer was complete, helpful, and completely out of the normal for the forum. The only thing more out of character would be if Teams actually had an option to make it work as any sane person would expect, but then, this is not on the forum people.
Seems suspicious. There probably is such an option hidden somewhere. Because whenever you get a clear answer there, it’s invariably wrong.
Well, if you find it, please tell :)
It’s a clear Microsoft paradox: is the support person right, or did Teams do something reasonable?
- help my mouse does not work
- did you try reinstalling windows?- did you try updating to Windows 11, enabling copilot and microsoft drive automatic upload?
The microsoft forums are the one place that could be fully automatized. You post a problem about anything, really anything. Can’t change wallpaper? Can’t login? Screen flashing? Files disappearing? Constant loud pitched noise? It’s all the same. The answer, whatever your issue, is
sfc /scannow, “Restoration point” and “Reinstall”.And arguably, that last step will most likely make the issue go away, at the price of not having a fucking clue as to what was wrong, losing a lot of time afterward, and having a fair chance of re-doing the same things, causing the issue to show up again. Great stuff.
Even more infuriating are those messages marked [FIXED] when the freaking post had a negative response or no response at all from the user.
Those forums should be full of endless posts marked [PENDING] or [EXPIRED].The most pissing thing is that the Microsoft “support” forum is always the top search result. Sometimes it occupies 5 or more of the top search results.
…but I haven’t had to deal with that since I switched to Linux last year, so…yay!
Does it solve whatever Windows problem they were having?
No? Then it is not helpful.
It is like asking for help to fix a hole in your pants, and someone replies with “just buy a skirt”.
I’ve replied to someone having a problem with Linux to just install Windows. It is the exact same useless vibe.
Well it is more like your ceiling is leaking from the apartment above and your landlord ain’t doing shit. Installing Linux would be like moving out to another apartment or home. Even if it doesn’t fix the leak the problem is now gone for you.
