Wrestle the pig first, every day. Whatever is your worst, most unpleasant, annoying task for the entire day, do it before you do anything else. It minimizes your stress and worrying and puts it in the rearview mirror.
For a second I thought you were talking about masturbation.
Well yeah crank your hog first of course
Spank the monkey
Filbert and Heffer playing “Spank the Monkey”
Oh bay bee, oh bay bee, oh bay bee.
Rocko?
Mrs. Bighead?
simultaneous phone slam
There was also that one that was cut from the camping episode.
Rocko is foraging for berries and he grabs one on a bush and the bush recoils and you hear a bear growl. Then a bear jumps out from behind the bush grabbing his crotch and running away in obvious pain.
Not really a “hack” but I don’t know why most people get into phone contracts.
Since college, I have always just bought unlocked phones with cash and then used the carrier’s prepaid plans and set it to auto pay.
I pay so much less than most people I know, I get all the same service, and my phone isn’t tied to a contract or carrier, so I can cancel my plan whenever I want and switch to another carrier by just buying their SIM card for ~$20.
My current phone is an unlocked Pixel 6a that I got on sale new for $300. I have unlimited talk, text, and data for $45 a month. And if I get sick of my current carrier or they bump my cost, I can just switch to anybody else for just the cost of a $20 SIM card.
I have so many friends and family members that complain about their phone bills being super high and their service sucking, but they can’t cancel their contracts without paying off their huge balances plus the interest and usually cancelation fees. Plus, because their phone is tied to the contract/carrier, they can’t even keep transfer the phone to the new carrier and have to get sucked into a “phone trade-in” deal and the cycle continues.
And for the folks saying that most people can’t afford to save up and buy a phone outright, there are a lot of places that offer payment plans for the phone, or you can buy it on credit and pay it off that way, which would likely be less interest over time. Or you could buy unlocked used/refurbished phones for 25-50% off their normal price.
Maybe it makes sense if you get a stipend from your company, or you bundle it with a bunch of other packages like cable TV or internet, but for just a cell phone, I just don’t get locking yourself into a crazy contract.
People wonder why I’m an optimist. I’m not really. What I do is expect people to disappoint me. After all, none of us are perfect. When they don’t I’m surprised. When they do, I’m not mad, as just met my expectations.
I find people who don’t like other people expect them to not disappoint them and when they do they get angry and upset. It’s really just a mindset change.
If you can’t find something and you’ve looked everywhere, get a flashlight and look again while pointing the flashlight. It has worked for me every time.
Same, I found my flashlight that way
I laughed at this because I have around ten flashlights and have absolutely used a smaller flashlight to find my Emisar D4V2 or my beloved DT8
Turn those aux lights on, fam. They hardly use much more power than natural battery internal resistance, and you can’t lose it lol
Spit in your toilet paper
Set up automatic bank transfers to chop your income into % parts: 5% play money, 20% savings, bills etc. do what works for you. Get rid of unnecessary subscriptions.
I just discovered the best hack, I changed the app layout on my home screen (android) to 5x5 what a game changer.
Everyone uses something less than Xx5? Damn. Poor folks. :(
Did anyone else have to go home & count?
I’m not very clever.
-
A pressure cooker
-
A ghetto bidet:
3D print it, or take a small softdrink bottle, make a hole in it’s neck using a hot needle or corkscrew. Fill it with water, hold it upside down and squirt your butthole clean with it. Use a little toiletpaper or cloth to dab it dry. Can’t live without it anymore.
-
