besides all that, she has an odd sense of humor but is really nice. not only this, but has been my friend since middle school, and i dated her in sixth grade. she has always been christian, but she’s practicing it more and feels like she has to “repent for her sins” and whatever.
she used to be a lesbian and then genderfluid but now she’s cishet and idk if she’ll understand what i’m going through, i also hope she didn’t decide this due to christianity.
and the gender identity and pronouns jokes feel weird to me as an enby and a lesbian 😓
will this end up actually bad for me like those superevangelicals?
Just so you know, someone isn’t “really nice” if they make jokes like that. Maybe she used to be nice, but she isn’t acting that way now.
I’m not sure how old you are, but it sounds like you’re both still teenagers or maybe young adults. People are trying to figure themselves out at that time, and sometimes what they try out is edgelord (especially when the edgelords are gaining political power). She may be testing boundaries of what is socially acceptable, in which case it’s in her best interests as well as yours to gently push back against this kind of behavior (or more forcefully later if she doesn’t take a hint).
Something like, “hey, it makes me uncomfortable when you make those ‘identify as’ jokes. You know I’m nonbinary and that sort of humor makes me feel like you don’t respect me. I fully support your identity, including your faith, and as your friend I hope you would do the same for me.”
Even if you are 1-on-1 for that chat, she is almost certainly going to respond negatively to that, so I would drop it there, but be prepared to remind her that you don’t like it later. Ideally after some reflection she wakes up and realizes she’s causing harm to your friendship, but be prepared to break it off entirely with her if she doesn’t want to treat you with respect.